The next Path of Exile expansion — Settlers of Kalguur — isn't launching until July 26 (with a full reveal planned for July 18), but that isn't stopping the community from having fun with it already.
The teaser trailer for the 3.25 Settlers league dropped July 5, and with it an implication this would be the famous 'boat league' developer Grinding Gear Games has been teasing for ages. Mind you, there's a fine line with this company between teasing and trolling, so it's entirely possible the mechanic this time around will have next to nothing to do with boats, as we saw with Heist league. Fans are getting silly with it though and not only assuming it's going to be a boat league, but pretending it's already out and giving each other advice on optimal boat builds and such.
"This is helpful and all but it gives no guidance on how to place my crew members. Basically useless without the crew setup too," writes Unarchy in response to the 'boat build' post, to which another user replies, "All 63 crewmembers except the helmsman ALWAYS go in the crownest."
Later in the thread, Clownshoes_Exile chips in with some sage wisdom: "Don't square sail the spanker. You need to jib your spanker for a lucky roll." Iwfcyb corrects them, noting, "No no. You need to hoist your spanker first, then jib it." Completing the saga, nowicanblockWPs writes, "Now that I'm getting older, I'm finding it increasingly difficult to hoist my spanker."
It goes on and on like this, so if you're looking for a good laugh and to kill an hour, give it a read. While you're at it, give the legendary 'What returning after a few years looks like' thread a gander, which no doubt inspired this tomfoolery.
A similar post showed up just a few hours later, wherein user Kholnik indicates everyone will be running around in a boat and picking up loot trawler-style (while dodging dreaded water Rhoas - as if the current ones weren't bad enough). User manowartank runs with the joke and says players will be using Ascendancies to power their boats, writing, "Is Deadeye overpowered again because of Gathering Winds?" Truly, when a game has a seemingly endless amount of mechanics, the well of jokes is bottomless.
A third thread then appeared a few more hours later wherein user tommos says we'll have to battle kraken for currency. Sounds scary, but at least there's an Enzomyte ship with immunity to kraken attacks - or there would be if it wasn't for a major bug (damn!). 'xsicho' responds with a workaround, writing, "Just use a Lioneye's Navigator so you can spot the kraken from two screens away. You don't need defenses if you can just offscreen escape from krakens." Tommos might be happy with this were he not a minmaxer ("But that means five less cargo slots per ship..."), so hopefully Grinding Gear Games fixes this imaginary bug before players start ragequitting this pretend league.
No doubt more of these threads will pop up in the coming days; Path of Exile players have to stay sane somehow during teaser week, after all.
If you're looking for more Path of Exile content, check out our Sanctum Guide here on Pro Game Guides.
